Thursday, December 29, 2011

iAm Here.

We finally gave in. And it's not just because it was the holidays. Well, we can find every excuse in the book including Mandarin killed my mobile phone: death by forceful throwing, but it's probably just because it is the holidays! A few weeks ago, our tech lives changed when two iPhones arrived on our doorstep. As it stepped into our home, my husband and I both stepped out into the present day. Possibly, the last of humankind to do so.

We don't live under a rock either, mind you. We're tech savvy, I know a pinch of code and my husband can pretty much figure his way through anything with specs and cables but the iphone to me always held an air of exclusivity - in which you are exclusively glued to it just like the rest of the world; an army of people huddled over the lucent sorcery this palm sized screen is capable of. So, for years my husband and I pretty much dodged it and favored no contract plans and so-so smartphones. 

Until now. We bit into the Apple and re-awakened into a landscape of applications.

So there we were, two adults crossing the tech threshold. When you think about it, there is quite literally a world of applications and hidden fees out there. Will we transform into zombie game playing, application hoarding, email shooting, words-with-friends playing junkies? Quite possibly so. And thus, the absence

Now that the honeymoon phase is over and this device is now just a phone that does pretty much everything else except kiss and nurture your child, the question that floats to the surface is:  How does this gadget affect me as a parent? As a mother? There are far to many distractions as it is, I wouldn't want another piece of technology to take me away from spending quality time with my daughter, or teach her that a phone can babysit her all the time. Because we all know, it is capable of doing so: crowded restaurant + overwhelmed and hungry toddler = meltdown. Sometimes, you really just need to zone them into Zen. 

So far, I've saved scraps of paper by using a grocery application, used Skype a multitude of times so Mandarin can see her Grandparents in Manila, and kept her from hysterically running after other children, (screaming and laughing with glee) at church on Christmas Eve by letting her watch Mickey Mouse Clubhouse.

Technology works. 

However, when does it become too much tech for your toddler? I assume it's when you line up a book, your smartphone, a plush doll, and a sippy cup on a table and your child goes for the phone, and only the phone. Hand them the book, and they still go for the phone. As if they were choosing to suspend all other things for the glory of the gadget.

This really does concern me, not just as a parent but as a consumer who by experience knows that resistance is futile. You push a button and something opens and lights up. It is the very same simplicity that makes this device intuitive and alluring to both adults and young children. Although I feel extremely fortunate that Mandarin LOVES books and hope that she continues to find magic in between its pages well into her adult years, the reality is, children like her are born into this technology and will live and grow with it through the years.

You can see this in the isles of toy stores everywhere. While I do have a penchant for vintage toys and hope that Mandarin may someday find some sentimentality in that, she may not even know what a rotary phone is for and how it's even used!

Mommy, what's vinyl? 


Same company, just keeping up with the times. 

It's all about pushing buttons, these days. Children love to watch and mimic adults so it's no surprise that there are toy versions of pretty much everything we use daily.

My own mother comes to mind when there is talk of technology. After what seemed to be WAS a long decade of  convincing, she finally agreed to learn how to email. She bought an ipad and thankfully no longer depends on other people to show her pictures of her granddaughter, or rather is no longer the last person in the family to see them. It was intimidating to her at first but with a slow and steady pace she's now attempted to walk through the app store and buy games. Meanwhile, across the Pacific her granddaughter, also new to technology,  is eager, excited, and wildly curious about it - and the world around her too.  It is for all those reasons why I feel as a parent I need to incite more creative play with her developmental toys, a very important part of their advancement as children.

Technology is no doubt a teachable platform that allows much room for education. It is a strict lesson on discipline both for parent and child. How far to give in and when to restrain, how much time to spend on it and when to set it down and get some sand in between your toes. Of course as parents we would want our children to be a step ahead and not behind, so as a compromise, I feel that if I was going to let her play with the phone while outdoors anyway, it might as well be used as a medium for education. I've listed a few applications I've found that may be useful tools for young toddlers.

                                      10 Best Educational iPhone Applications for Toddlers

1. Flash Cards By Parents Magazine
2. Peek-a-Boo Barn Farm Animals
4. Interactive Alphabet ABC Flashcards
6. Grover's Number Special (Counting App for Toddlers)
7. Shape Builder Puzzle Game 
8. First Words  Series.
9. Sound Touch : Over 300 sounds and images


As a parent, I fear that she may suspend her innate ability to explore and her naturally curious mind by zoning in too much into the allure of LCD screens and high resolution images in the manner we do. Thus, the challenge. To lead by example, because that's what being a parent - being a mother is all about. Mandarin may (as a last resort) have her chance to discover the iPhone when we're out and about and there is a dire need to mollify her in a public area. As a general rule at home, we don't let her fiddle with our iPhones and try to keep it away from view as much as possible. She has too many more interesting things to play with. Music instruments, books, wooden blocks and toys, and dolls. I suppose this is our way of keeping a harmonious note of moderation in the media-laden age we live in.

This is my hope as a mother; that she steps out into the world well-balanced, educated, informed,  independent and imaginative for creative play and that she knows how to happily keep herself busy with the ability to unplug herself from all the invisible wires that hold us captive.







Friday, December 9, 2011

Friday Five : Four




1. Freshly made apple cider from a stall in Pike Place Market.
2. Getting ready for an afternoon stroll around the neighborhood.
3. Our Maple tree standing tall in front of our house.
4. What is it about early afternoon shadow pictures that I love? It's so whimsical. You can almost make out Mandarin's kitty-cat hoodie ears. 
5. Pink Balloon flowers makes those shy dimples POP!


The gears of Christmas is in full rotation in our household, putting a halt to pretty much everything else - including posts that I've lined up about our Thanksgiving trip. Our petite Christmas tree is on its second year and has recently survived the huff and puff of our little girl, who not only stands in front of it with  the finger pointing "wow" but who, out of curiosity (and who can resist shiny ornaments, really) pulled on an glittery ribbon that ultimately sent the entire tree crashing down. 

Timber?

Nonetheless, the tree survived and is now cautiously cordoned off by a coffee table and a cajon. I'm still  keeping my eye on Mandarin, the shiny silver reindeer ornament beckons her and I wouldn't be surprised if she learns how to climb over if only to pet or lick it. 

  


Thursday, December 1, 2011

Back Home

We made it back home safely. After bouncing about in hotel rooms and a number of different beds within the span of a week, we are back to a house that although may not fully be ours, is definitely home; for now. Back to a bed that probably isn't as comfortable as the fluff and tuft of crisp white 1500 count cotton sheets we slept in, but is where we snuggle in as a family, taupe duvet, floral pillows, milk stains and all. Back to our lovely clutter of hellish laundry - the aftermath of a week's worth for the three of us. 

Mt. Shasta LOVES you.
It's such a joy to see symbols in nature - at least what we make of it.
This was in no way photo shopped to shape out a heart - it really was there!  

Although the drive was long, Mandarin slept, played, read (well not really read but looked through her books)  and watched Mickey Mouse and Little Einstein, and alphabet phonics on our makeshift tablet / player. We were pummeled with rain and fog and extremely terrible standstill holiday traffic (12 hours to Seattle from Jacksonville, Oregon) and chilly temperatures that made you fluff up your feathers for a little more warmth. 

I really meant to blog on the road but found the schedule too hectic, (coughing) toddler in hand and oh just about 35 people celebrating Thanksgiving in a lovely town just twenty minutes off Seattle. Somewhere between soaking in small town charms, long drives, ferry rides, precious baby nap times, eating copious amounts of stuffing, turkey, roast beef, pies and WA state micro brews, I lost time for myself and found that if you surrender to the tide you learn how to drift through the joyful chaos.



And while we did have a fantastic time, there wasn't much time for a gratitude time-out. To stand in the corner and quit complaining that we had to wake up far too early, sleep late, maybe not sleep at all, wear fifty layers of clothes, get cold and work up a sweat shortly after, and not have much time to sit back and relax and pretty much do nothing. Knock back a few good IPA beers and sing Pearl Jam's Breath until I hit all of Eddie's notes. Or lose my voice. Whichever comes first. 

What does it take to be happily satiated?

I will not pretend to know the answer to this question. It seems that in everything that I do or anywhere I go there is always a certain time when that pinch of loneliness, a shadow of darkness, an echo that sounds off from a place that I am familiar with but cannot exactly find, comes up to the surface and reminds me that it's there.  And it's not because I am not thankful. I'm not sure why it's there, but it is and has been a part of who I am for as far back as I can remember. It may be the voice of shifting hormones or sadness or PMS that momentarily shifts my perspective and empties me of the sense of appreciation. 

The point is; it doesn't matter what you don't have. What  I  don't have. Siblings (I envy those with siblings...damn only-child-syndrome ), a house, a decent shoe rack, financial freedom, a Balenciaga Bag and Kim Kardashian's engagement rock ring.  

Now that we're back home, I've had time to reflect as the dust settles from our tracks. It is easy to give thanks, sure. Thank you for the food on our table. Thank you for clothes that keep us warm. But to be thankful with meaning, to feel fortunate way down and deep in your gut for the good things you have going for you. That's a challenge because, frankly, it's much easier to complain. 

What matters is what is actually there. Here and now. My parents, my besties (M & A), my closest cousins, our closest friends, uncles and aunts, a home, Mandarin memories, a kind and loving husband (who thankfully, really is my best friend of many many many years), a worn-out Steve Madden cross body that does the job, and a little girl that delicately whispers a most amiable "uh-oh" right before she nods off to sleep. There it is, straight from the gut.



More photos from the trip to follow!



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